I woke up refreshed and almost completely cured, It felt amazing, beyond amazing. I usually am pretty groggy during the first hours of morning, also when my health is top notch, but that Sunday morning my awareness soared. My eyes stayed wide open.
The world outside, the daylight breaking through the windows didn’t seem real. What was within the walls of our gathering felt very much so, poignant and passionate and all great words and acts.
It’s pretty funny. I re-experienced everyone and everything from the day before in a way. Saturday was a fever dream, Sunday a feverish, passionate reality…
I hugged Ruby, Dorothy, Camille, Alan and the rest, each and every one of them again, and they chuckled softly, laughing with me.
We gathered around the breakfast long table. It felt like we had done it every morning, like we did long ago. This wasn’t reminiscing, but on the contrary living in the moment.
- A la vida, Dorothy said and raised her glass filled with pale wine. – To Life!
- TO LIFE! We all choired.
We drank and feed and drank again, a thousand different scents and tastes enriching our lives.
I was brought twenty-seven years back in time, when I first heard those Spanish words, heard her speak them. The intonation was almost exactly the same. She had aged, for good and for bad, like we all had, but she hadn’t truly changed, not in her core. She had grown. I realized in that moment that we had all grown, had made Bob Dylan’s words ours.
When I looked around and listened to those sitting with me around the table and I knew that almost no one here had joined the pervasive mainstream shit, and that alone feels like a miracle, and I felt pride and joy beyond words.
I haven’t met many truly free people in my lifetime, no matter how hard I’ve searched for them, but many sat around that table. I recalled a great past and noticed a great present in potent and poignant ways.
My thoughts had been muddled with fever yesterday. Today it was increasingly muddled with alcohol, but I still enjoyed a mind clearer, far clearer than on most ordinary days, like I benefited from a thousand cold showers without the disadvantages.
The memories of bygone days and nights flowed effortlessly between us, the past and present mingling and becoming one.